So far I’ve been a good friend,I’ve never envied my friend, infact they want to be more like me than I’ll ever say I want to be like them,but something happened this week that got me questioning my character. I have a friend who has been in a relationship myself and others consider toxic, it’s clear they love each but the guy and I have never gotten along although 3 of us have met a couple of times. After helping them settle an issue they dragged me into,out of nowhere he starts texting me and I honestly thought it was a test/prank but it was going to far to be one. We ended up sleeping together,I confess it wasn’t a mistake even the devil knows, he doesn’t regret it and even wants more,and I feel numb rn . But this is one of those things that are pointless, I don’t like him infact we don’t like each other,I didn’t like sex, I’m not bored, I don’t want attention,I didn’t do it out of spite,so why did I do it?
Right now,we’re not talking and I’m glad, because I am disappointed in myself and so is God