I love/hate me most times

Hi I’m a 24yrs old girl, with three boyfriends and multiple body count, I love looking beautiful but I’m not satisfied with myself most times. I got a skin problem eczema, I stream on TikTok same as my friend, they get gifts than me and so I hate myself because I think God counts my sins more even though I feel like I have not done half of the sins my friends does. It hurts that I feel like his least favorite sinner

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