Self deceit

I love him. I know i do. No one’s ever treated me so right but i don’t like his physique. He looks like a sick patient. Malnourished. I feel ashamed to post him. Worse case, he is an upcoming artist i feel embarrassed posting his songs so my friends won’t look him up. I have provided enough food for him to eat, yet he wont get bigger. I laugh when i see his legs, I’m a bad person 😭 how am i wanting and not wanting him at once. Life!

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