I’m currently in a mess and a place I hate. My life is in shambles and crumbling right in front of me. This world or life has given me more sadness than joy. It’s like everything is going bad for me. No day comes and I don’t see or have problems. Shame and reproach has been the order of the day. I have become a total shadow of myself. So I started using loan apps which caused majorly my problem. 1 loan app gradually grew to 20 i started using loan apps to repay loan apps because I don’t want my image to be published to my contacts. Now I have no means of paying back. I use all my salary to payback money I didn’t spend. One even did RIP for me. I have over #400,000 to pay loan apps with their interest. The calls or the messages is to damn much. I’m tired . I have a sister-in-law that is so manipulative well I don’t blame her I blame myself for entering into her trap. So she started shouting and embarrassing me that I’m oweing her money. Money that I didn’t collect physical cash from her. If we go to the market she’s always like forcing me to buy stuffs I don’t have money for and she will be like I’ll give her back later. Single drawn frontal that is #20k and she has for over 7 years suddenly she sold it for me #35k. Now her son got into university convenant. She doesn’t have the capacity to take her son there but she forced her way there. When the son was going I gave him virtually everything I have my smart watch, airpods, and several others that since I don’t have money to support let me give him what I have. So now she terrorizes me because of all those accumulated money she says don’t worry later because she wants to give her son money. On Thursday I came back from work she kept me outside till after 12midnight that she must get money and I don’t have. I went back to some loan apps I had paid off to borrow and send her #10,000 now this morning she’s at my apartment screaming that she needs money in front of everyone and even lieing about the amount I owe her. The person that can give me money too she was shouting now the person said that I should sort out myself. I have nowhere to turn to now because I don’t have money. I used all my salary to pay back loan that I don’t have money to survive for this new month. Now tell me if I commit suicide now and go to hell fire now don’t you think it’s the best decision. Now ehn I can sleep with anything for money. Even thought of selling my kidney or selling and part of my body to yahoo boys who does ritual and tell them if I must die let it be peaceful. Now today I need like #50,000 to give 2person one #30k and my sister-in-law #20k.where would I see that type of money. My life is finished.