I am a man, I’m 21 years old, and I’ve been loving this lonely life even when I live among people I call blood. So years ago all of a sudden I lost my happiness and ever since then I have been trying to be strong and happy! I can make people happy but in my room at night my bed is full of tears. I care about others happiness, but people don’t care about me and I don’t feel appreciated, though I’m the youngest, but they only appreciate me. They needed something from me. Furthermore, I don’t like seeing people sad, but I’m sad. What should I do? I want to be happy, I thought money was happiness!!! I don’t have much, but I drive a car that my mate drives and I live In a comfortable apartment. What’s wrong with me? Every night, my head is full of suicide. All of a sudden, I feel betrayed. I’m this type that doesn’t have friends or even relationships. I tried once In my 20s, and she cheated, lied and even worse. People think I am dumb, but I’m not, I just want people to be happy I tried relationship I make her happy, but she’s sleeping with other men. That’s not my problem, but why Is this happening to me? I feel lonely, I feel like killing myself. Those around see me, maybe I’m stupid ! Again my words don’t matter or let me say I don’t have a say whenever I’m broke so my heads up all time hustling!!! No happy moment. Is this how people live, or is it just my life? Well my birthday is early next year, I will be ending my life in my room. I told people around already that my birthday next year will be different. But before then I want to make a lot for my siblings because no dad, so they won’t suffer. I’m not the firstborn. Or is’t that nobody like me maybe everyone loves me for what they can gain. OAU.