Is it normal to be craving for death, I’m used to waking up sad because my nightmares are constantly controlling my reality. Working so hard and got nothing to prove for it. People that I put on are doing much better and they don’t believe whenever I talked about how hard it is for me. They all think maybe I’m using my money for something else they don’t know about just because I don’t like showing sign of weakness. But my heart & soul is tired, I’m scared of sleeping. Prayer isn’t working for years. Like God can I just die rather than being stuck in this cycle/Cage