I’m suicidal and depressed.
It’s like this, I don’t want to die but I don’t want to live like this either.
I have highs and lows my lows are very very low and even during my high points, I’m still always at the verge of tears. I’m at a point in my life that I don’t really believe in God anymore because I really don’t know. Why is everything working against me. I’m lost yet I can’t talk to anyone.
A week ago my parents called me that they got a strange phone call from their pastor that they should pray that their daughter does not commit suicide, when I heard it I was totally. It was the perfect opportunity that God probably opened for me so I can confess that I need help but I just couldn’t. They sounded so sad and scared and I didn’t want to put them through that kind of thing. But honestly it’s hard
People don’t really know what depression does to a person… That darkness
It engulfs you, whispers to you about how worthless you are, all your insecurities are glaring at you and all you can do is cry and cry.
I just want to share it here cause… Why not. No one will understand anyway