😔😪

I’m really getting fed up with all these complain.
After staying away from relationship for a very long period , I finally met this guy sometime last year . After 3 months , I finally said yes and we kicked off dating .
He’s caring , so sweet , wouldn’t let me do anything when I come to visit . He can give me anything at all as far as it’s available . I can even be at his place for a week and when I say I’m not gonna have sex , he doesn’t bother me even till the day I would wanna go, I can then do it . Don’t get me wrong , I love him a lot and I know he loves me too . He tries as much as possible to respect my feelings and my presence.
Puts his phone on silent when I’m around , hardly chats and gives me attention no matter how long I’m around . I’ve asked him severally why he doesn’t always receive calls and chat when I’m around , he said because he felt I might be feeling bad . I thought he was just pleasing me because we started dating newly . It’s 4 months now , he has never misbehaved for once .
To cut long story short , he pisses me off with I don’t trust you word but you want me to trust you . I don’t have a problem trusting you(though I got trust issues)but because I love him . I try not to let my foolish trust issues get in between , though sometimes I get jealous over some calls but he tries to explain till I’m satisfied(though no point of suspicious in the call , I’m just jealous because I love him)even when I’m home,we talk on video call always . Even while I wanna hangout with my friends , I tell him , when I come to his house he sees I don’t receive random calls because I don’t really give out my number or go about meeting men . I’m open to him but he still tells me I need to earn the trust . Even this 14 days lock down I’ve been with him over a week before the lock down and adding the 5th day extras since the lock down started . He has not seen me doing odd thing of playing fishy or receiving calls . Last night we talked about this trust thing till 3AM . I made him see reasons . Today same topic because I said I wanted to get home to pick few stuffs and he said his spirit said I shouldn’t go . I respected him and sat back but what pissed me off till right now I’m writing this is he told me he doesn’t know why he is finding it difficult to trust me and I just lost my mind instantly . It’s painful like I’m working to even earn the trust in vain . He has never been in love , he just roll with girls and move on and finally he is in love with someone for the first time in his life and he is scared I will break his heart . I told him severally let’s be positive and work on making things beta for the relationship but hell no ! negativity and dreams of someone else fucking his girl won’t let him reason.Yulk I really need advice on how to handle this sincerely I’m loosing it . Since today I’ve been thinking to just tell him to go on a break while we work on ourselves first but then I’m confused . I don’t wanna make mistake with decision when I’m angry but seriously it’s beginning to piss me off . Months of the same convo . #Amtired

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